Friday, June 14, 2013

Reflections on motherhood and Mytop 5

The more I take care of me with everyday rituals the more space and love I have to give to others. Common sense some might say but it's something l have just begun to see the value in. I guess l always thought it was rather selfish now l know it to be crucial to being a good mum.
It's a lesson I'm embracing with each day as I challenge myself, lately l have been feeling like there is so much unfinished around me, it's brought on immense feelings of mother-guilt. The voice that tells you, you should be capable of achieving everything in good time. I've felt as if l have been floundering. I have to remind myself Little fox is only five and a half months old and teething and have a toddler going through what l could only describe as adolescence. When l stop and talk to my mother guilt l know l am doing all l can. The need to be patient and kind to myself but it's an ongoing reminder that l am still learning. Being held accountable with MyTop5 keeps me mindful of taking care of me.

I've been busy, taking care of others, doing Montessori, setting up the Etsy shop and being a mother to my two wee ones. I've got handmade stock to put in the Etsy shop and it's this weeks goal from today to work on it. I've got blogposts written and not yet finished and I going to complete those too. For the past couple of weeks l have been less goal orientated with Mytop5 and more self aware. I've been enjoying practising awareness in nature and in everyday moments. Returning to daily practise of the breath and everyday rituals that ground me to the present.
Noticing the sunshine streaming in the windows of our car as we drove along the coast exploring and having adventures this past week. Watching how the change in season plays with the landscape. The turn in the colours and the bare trees. Tree limbs now naked and bare with only the memory of it's leaves - a woven mess on the ground.  Sand and loamy soil imprinted with rain and wind and ever-changing. Paddocks lush, green and windblown. Cattle feasting on the grass bracing themselves against the wintry elements. Lambs standing near their mothers no longer small but limber and adventurous together in groups. 

Then I've also been practising the art of shopping and lunching at cafe's with my tribe. I splurged at my favourite shop in Barwon heads Kiitoslivingbydesign and bought socks to wear with my salties. But the highlight was watching Miss Three playing with a wooden tram with its round peg people while i caught up with the owner and had a chat with Maria about the importance of looking after me. It's strange how those unplanned conversations are happening more and more. There have been lots of things l have done for myself but more than anything l now realise l am important too in my tribe and l deserve comfort and TLC too.
Returning home to washing needing to be done. A house clean but in need of a vacuum. Meals to be cooked and baby food to be made. I noticed this morning on my way out the door to drop Miss Three at childcare that the garden is changing.  Seeds we planted before we left on our holiday pushing tiny green shoots through the soil and garlic tops growing another cm or two. When the rain stops broad beans, brocolli, kale, more garlic and peas need to go in. The zucchinis to be pulled out and a potato bed planted in front of the lounge window. Little fox sleep on the couch pillow as l write this as previous attempts to put him to bed haven't worked. A perfect example how what we think should happen doesn't and how we need to remember to be fluid in our mothering and our daily life practise.
I hope this week you look after yourself and take care of you.

Enjoying coffee's, a good film, new hair and a crochet bear
spending time at McCanns nursery a haven for slow breakfasts', hot coffee and play
vino o'clock, being silly, watching nature
catching up with Maria at Kiitos and being reminded to take care of me
buying lush socks for winter and sharing a cuddle moment with Miss 3
lunching with my tribe at Gingermais and actually having time with Ads

What are your top 5 going to be? Try to take care of you by doing just one thing for yourself this week. Join the blog by being a member so i know your here. Follow me on Instagram during the week @thepoppyfox, join in and use hash tag #sbtbmytop5 and drop me a line so l can follow you as you venture into your Top5.

X Mummafox.

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